“SPOILER ALERT! If you haven’t seen episode 9 of season 2 of Once Upon a Time, then you might not want to read this!
This was the fall finale of Once Upon a Time, and, boy, did they cram a lot of stuff in it.
There was something about magical squid ink, again, alluding to a possible confrontation with the little mermaid.
It turns out the Emma has a magical heart, because she is a true love baby, so it cannot be taken out of her chest. The means that almost all of the other characters aren’t true love babies, since they all seem to have removable hearts. I wonder how they feel finding out that their parents didn’t truly love eachother?
Charming was let out of his sleeping curse after only spending about an afternoon in it, so, that was nice.
At the end there was some jazz about Emma and Snow using the only portal out of The Fairytale Land That Was, thereby preventing Cora and Hook from getting to Storybrooke, but, somehow, Cora and Hook managed to get to Storybrooke in the last second of the episode, anyway.
Yay, even the bad guys get their problem immediately fixed in this show.
Bleh, I had more than this written up about this episode, but Windows did one of those automatic shutdowns and I lost it. Bleh.
Hey! If you haven’t seen episode 8 of season 2 of Once Upon a Time, then you might not want to read this!
DISCO INFERNO
This episode is about a fire at a disco.
A magical fiery disco that people can visit in their dreams.
Mulan maybe might be a little bit of a lesbian?
Tenderness
Captain Hook somehow pulled out Aurora’s heart, which means that he knows some magic. This means that there are no non-magical villains anymore. This upsets me a little because it was nice that there was a villain that was different than all the rest. Now it’s just like, “Hi! We’re all magical wizards that want more magic so we can magic up the magic!” I guess King George is still a normal-person villain, but, as a king, he still vast resources. I would like to see a sort of grass roots pulled themselves up by their bootstraps type of villain. You know, someone that would actually have to work hard to be villainous. It’s all too easy for our current crop.
glowy hearty thinger
I’m still for something to really happen on this show. The characters seem to be running around a whole lot and not really accomplishing much.
SPOILER ALERT! If you haven’t seen episode 7 of the second season of Once Upon a Time, you might not want to read this!
So, the entire point of this episode seemed to be to fill in the plot hole of how Granny doesn’t turn into a wolf during Wolf’s Time.
What is with this show and orphans? First they killed off Charming’s Mother and now they’ve killed off Red’s mother.
I don’t know, I don’t really have much to say about this episode. Red needed to find a way to control her wolf side. She met her mother who taught her how to control it. Her mother then died, because the plot didn’t need her anymore. It’s pretty straight forward.
The only thing, which is a mystery, I guess, is what’s going on with this one dumpster:
79 times Boats only
So it says “Boats only”, so I assume this is the dumpster just for boats, but what does “79 times” mean? Did something happen 79 times in this dumpster? IT’S A MYSTERY!
SPOILER ALERT! If you have seen episode 6 season 2 of Once Upon a Time, then you might not want to read this!
I don’t know, for an episode that was supposed to be some big revelation, I found this episode to be kind of “blah”.
So, anyway…
Yeehaw! It’s 1870!
Michael Raymond-James’ character, who we met way back in episode 1 of season 2, is a guy named “Neal Cassidy”. He was Emma’s boyfriend and he is probably Henry’s dad. Then again, we never saw a paternity test, so whoever fathered Henry is still up for grabs. My bet is on Henry having been conceived by THE FORCE and something something midi-chlorians.
A more important question, I think, is why does August Booth have Marsellus Wallace’s soul?
WHAT’S IN THE BOX!?
There was also some jazz in this episode about stealing a magical golden compass from the last big friendly giant in the world. Hey, a golden compass? Who owns the movie rights to the His Dark Materials movie series, now that New Line Cinema has gone belly up? If I recall correctly, there was travel between universes in His Dark Materials, just like in Once Upon a Time. They could totally do a crossover! I doubt ABC would want to anger the Catholic church though…
And, apparently, Captain Hook is in love with Emma, or something. LOVE TRIANGLE! DRAMA BOMB!
Also, Neal gave August a bunch of money to give to Emma, but August spent it all on hookers.
I think they need to make Mulan a little less angry all the time.
SPOILER ALERT! If you haven’t seen Once Upon a Time episodes 2 through 5, you might not want to read this article.
Due to an illness and server troubles, I haven’t been keeping up with posting as many Once Upon a Time articles as I’d like to. So, here are some little summaries of my thoughts on episodes 2 through 5.
S02E02: We Are Both
Magic smells good!
Ugh. They’re making magic analogousness to drugs. So, does that only mean that evil magic is like drugs and good magic is like prescription drugs? Because, no one has any problem with the magic that the fairies use. Seems like a broken aesop to me.
Going over the town line means that you lose your fairy tale memories and are only left with your Storybrooke memories. Rumpelstiltskin never had any Storybrooke persona. Would he lose his entire memory or would he gain a Storybrooke persona, if he went over the town line? Also, who went over the town line to get Henry?
S02E03: Lady of the Lake
Emma smells good!
Charming’s mother dies needlessly in this episode! It’s a world full of magic! They most definitely could have found something other than the magic lake water to cure Snow White elsewhere.
“Hey, Emma, ogres hunt by sound!” Emma: “I’mma fire my gun for no good reason!”
An awul lot of the Enchanted Forest seems to exist still. I though most of it was supposed to be a void?
S02E04: The Crocodile
Rumpelstiltskin and Captain Hook smell good!
So, Rumpelstiltskin is now the Fairygodmother from Cinderella, the Beast from Beauty and the Beast, the Dark One and the crocodile from Peter Pan. They need to stop making Rumpelstiltskin every character from every book. I mean, I love watching Robert Carlyle chew the scenery, but, seriously, this is getting to be too much.
Sexy Captain Hook? EVERYTHING MUST BE SEXY!
How did Rumpelstiltskin get such a sexy wife in the first place?
S02E05: The Doctor
Sexy Igor smells good!
Regina had a whole vault full of hearts. Why couldn’t Victor Frankenstein just ask for an extra one? Why did he have to trick her out of a heart?
Sexy Igor? Well, at least it wasn’t angry teenage Igor.
Why isn’t Frankenstein black and white everywhere that he goes? (It’s definitely due to budgetary constraints, but still…)
SPOILER ALERT! If you haven’t seen Broken, the first episode of the second season of Once Upon a Time, then you probably shouldn’t read this. I’m too lazy to provide the requisite expository text, for a person that hasn’t seen this episode, to understand this article, anyway.
I don’t really feel like running through the whole episode, so I’ll just go through my thoughts on a few things about it.
MYSTERIOUS MAN
At the start of the episode, we meet a new character and never learn who he is. Who he is ins’t really important, though, because he doesn’t actually do anything in the episode. Most people are going to say that he is Baelfire, but I think that would be too easy.
Here are some things around his apartment that may be clues to his identity.
MYSTERIOUS SHOP SIGN
He has a sign for a hatter’s shop. Was it from Jefferson, the mad hatter’s shop? Is our mystery man from Wonderland?
MYSTERIOUS SKATEBOARD DECK
He has a skateboard deck with the letters “NSNO” visible, or, since you can rotate these letters 180°, “ONSN”. So, it’s either a word ending with “NSNO”, or a word starting with “ONSN”. I couldn’t think of any. If you know anyway, please tell me in the comments.
MYSTERIOUS MONOCLE & POCKET WATCH
He has a pocket watch and a monocle hanging on his wall. The white rabbit carries a pocket watch, re-enforcing my Wonderland theory. Multiple Disney characters have monocles. I’m not sure which monocle-wearing character would be most likely.
MYSTERIOUS BALLET SLIPPERS
There are some ballet slippers on his wall. Maybe, he’s one of the dancing hippos or gators from Fantasia.
MYSTERIOUS DREAMCATCHER
He also has a dreamcatcher. I don’t really know if he looks Native American, or not. It is possible that he is John Smith, or one of the other colonists.
What is broken?
Lot’s of people are going to assume that the “Broken” on this postcard mean that the curse has been broken. Lots of things could be broken. Maybe, the word “broken” here doesn’t even mean “broken”. Maybe, it’s code. You don’t know.
Storybrooke is broken?
Was this postcard actually sent from Storybrooke, or, was it sent from a different location with the Storybooke picture as a clue for our mystery gentleman?
Current “True Love’s Kiss” Tally: 1
Here are our new royals: Princess Aurora II Electric Boogaloo and Prince Phillip Neckerchief Hipster. I say Aurora II because this Aurora mentions that her mother had to deal with Maleficent as well.
Mulan
We also have Mulan as a new character. She doesn’t really do much, except be a warrior and angry.
It’s a dementor! No… It’s a ringwraith!
So, we have wraiths attacking people, now. I’m willing to bet that the wraiths are connected to my “bigger bad” they, where Regina and Rumpelstiltskin will have to join forces against and even bigger evil. I’m guessing that these wraiths are the minions of the “bigger bad”.
Spooky Amulet
The wraiths wear these amulets. If you touch one of these amulets, the wraiths will come after you and suck your soul out of your face à la Shang Tsung.
I tried to look up what this character was, but the closest I got was that it could be a stylized version of the Chinese character “wáng, which means “king”.
Heh. Stylized wang.
The Other Side of the Spooky Amulet
The other side of the amulet has a different character on it. I couldn’t find any frames where it was clear, though.
Why isn’t his curse being broken?
This bugged me. Rumpelstiltskin/Mr. Gold kissed Belle, but his curse wasn’t broken. Are they not truly in love anymore?
A Palace!
This is the beautiful palace that Aurora and Phillip were to live in, but that didn’t work out so well. We are never told where in the fairy tale world this palace is situated in.
Agrabah
The domes on the roof make it look a bit like the palace in Agrabah, though.
Why aren’t they dead?
So, Emma and Snow White fall through a magic portal to a fairy tale world and they bust a bunch of stuff up, but there’s not a scratch on them. It was a nice touch that they had Snow holding on to Emma’s jacket.
