My Thoughts On: Once Upon a Time S02E07 “Child of the Moon”

SPOILER ALERT! If you haven’t seen episode 7 of the second season of Once Upon a Time, you might not want to read this!

So, the entire point of this episode seemed to be to fill in the plot hole of how Granny doesn’t turn into a wolf during Wolf’s Time.

What is with this show and orphans? First they killed off Charming’s Mother and now they’ve killed off Red’s mother.

I don’t know, I don’t really have much to say about this episode. Red needed to find a way to control her wolf side. She met her mother who taught her how to control it. Her mother then died, because the plot didn’t need her anymore. It’s pretty straight forward.

The only thing, which is a mystery, I guess, is what’s going on with this one dumpster:

a dumpster that reads: "79 times boats only"
79 times Boats only

So it says “Boats only”, so I assume this is the dumpster just for boats, but what does “79 times” mean? Did something happen 79 times in this dumpster? IT’S A MYSTERY!

My Thoughts On: Once Upon a Time S02E06 “Tallahassee”

SPOILER ALERT! If you have seen episode 6 season 2 of Once Upon a Time, then you might not want to read this!

I don’t know, for an episode that was supposed to be some big revelation, I found this episode to be kind of “blah”.

So, anyway…

a wanted poster for Neal Cassid (play by Michael Raymond-James)
Yeehaw! It’s 1870!

Michael Raymond-James’ character, who we met way back in episode 1 of season 2, is a guy named “Neal Cassidy”. He was Emma’s boyfriend and he is probably Henry’s dad. Then again, we never saw a paternity test, so whoever fathered Henry is still up for grabs. My bet is on Henry having been conceived by THE FORCE and something something midi-chlorians.

A more important question, I think, is why does August Booth have Marsellus Wallace’s soul?

Neal Cassidy (played by Michael Raymond-James) and August Booth (played by Eion Bailey) looking into august's box

There was also some jazz in this episode about stealing a magical golden compass from the last big friendly giant in the world. Hey, a golden compass? Who owns the movie rights to the His Dark Materials movie series, now that New Line Cinema has gone belly up? If I recall correctly, there was travel between universes in His Dark Materials, just like in Once Upon a Time. They could totally do a crossover! I doubt ABC would want to anger the Catholic church though…

And, apparently, Captain Hook is in love with Emma, or something. LOVE TRIANGLE! DRAMA BOMB!

Also, Neal gave August a bunch of money to give to Emma, but August spent it all on hookers.

I think they need to make Mulan a little less angry all the time.

Once Upon a Time Catch Up

SPOILER ALERT! If you haven’t seen Once Upon a Time episodes 2 through 5, you might not want to read this article.

Due to an illness and server troubles, I haven’t been keeping up with posting as many Once Upon a Time articles as I’d like to. So, here are some little summaries of my thoughts on episodes 2 through 5.

S02E02: We Are Both

a screencap of regina mill (played by Lana Parrilla) breathing in some magic
Magic smells good!
  • Ugh. They’re making magic analogousness to drugs. So, does that only mean that evil magic is like drugs and good magic is like prescription drugs? Because, no one has any problem with the magic that the fairies use. Seems like a broken aesop to me.
  • Going over the town line means that you lose your fairy tale memories and are only left with your Storybrooke memories. Rumpelstiltskin never had any Storybrooke persona. Would he lose his entire memory or would he gain a Storybrooke persona, if he went over the town line? Also, who went over the town line to get Henry?

S02E03: Lady of the Lake

a screencap of emma swan (played by jennifer morrison) being smelled by an ogre
Emma smells good!
  • Charming’s mother dies needlessly in this episode! It’s a world full of magic! They most definitely could have found something other than the magic lake water to cure Snow White elsewhere.
  • “Hey, Emma, ogres hunt by sound!” Emma: “I’mma fire my gun for no good reason!”
  • An awul lot of the Enchanted Forest seems to exist still. I though most of it was supposed to be a void?

S02E04: The Crocodile

a screencap of rumpelstiltskin (played by robert carlyle) and captain hook (played by Colin O'Donoghue)
Rumpelstiltskin and Captain Hook smell good!
  • So, Rumpelstiltskin is now the Fairygodmother from Cinderella, the Beast from Beauty and the Beast, the Dark One and the crocodile from Peter Pan. They need to stop making Rumpelstiltskin every character from every book. I mean, I love watching Robert Carlyle chew the scenery, but, seriously, this is getting to be too much.
  • Sexy Captain Hook? EVERYTHING MUST BE SEXY!
  • How did Rumpelstiltskin get such a sexy wife in the first place?

S02E05: The Doctor

a screencap of sexy igor (played by Yurij Kis)
Sexy Igor smells good!
  • Regina had a whole vault full of hearts. Why couldn’t Victor Frankenstein just ask for an extra one? Why did he have to trick her out of a heart?
  • Sexy Igor? Well, at least it wasn’t angry teenage Igor.
  • Why isn’t Frankenstein black and white everywhere that he goes? (It’s definitely due to budgetary constraints, but still…)